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My Mother, My Best Friend

Muhammad Alshareef

category: Family Life


reads: 9155

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The Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam commanded him, "Go back, and the same way that you made them cry, make them laugh."

Ibn Umar radi Allahu anhu said, "Making ones parents cry is amongst the uqooq, a major sin!"

Shaykh al-Qaasim once said, "Subhan Allah! How can we leave our parents sobbing, tears that the throne of Allah shakes for, tears that unsettle the angels in the heavens, and then we claim that we want to go for jihaad so that Allah will be pleased with us? Go back and make them happy with your visit as you made them sad by your departure. If they laugh and are pleased with you, Allah will be pleased."

During the funeral of his mother, Al-Haarith Al-Aklee radi Allahu anhu weeped. When asked for the reason of his tears he said, "Why should I not cry when one of my doors to Paradise has now closed?"


We reap what we plant. In a far away land, a long time ago, a boy was born blind. His widowed mother, the good Muslimah that she was, did not lose hope in her du'a and pray she did, continuously. A few years later, the boy's sight returned, alhamdulillah. Soon after she realized that her village was not befitting for her son to excel in Islamic education, so with her son in hand they migrated to Makkah. There she saw that he was being instructed in Qur'an and Hadith, the latter becoming the young man's focus. He went out far and wide collecting Hadith and compiled a Hadith book that sits next to the Qur'an in authenticity forgetting not his mother who had raised him well. His mother named him Muhammad ibn Isma'il, and many of us know him today as Al-Imam Al-Bukhari!

Dear brothers and sisters, how often is it that a farmer plants wheat and it comes out as a sunflower? You may say, never! For how can someone farm the seed of one plant and expect some other plant to grow. It just does not happen. Similarly, some parents leave their children waddling in the mud of television, music, movies, and disbelieving friends. Then, when the child reaches grade 12 and asks to go to the prom with his girlfriend, or when he enters university and stops praying, or when he gets married to a kafir and himself becomes one, then the parents say, "What happened?"

Brothers and sisters, it is the harvest of what we planted. If we do not raise our children to be obedient, where do we expect them to learn? If we do not practice Islam ourselves, who will be our children's example? How do you teach a child to wake up for Fajr, when he sees his own father and mother sleeping in, day after day? You may ask: how do I raise my children to be good Muslims, obedient to their parents? Consider the following:

Firstly: One should discipline their children throughout their youth. Hisham ibn Abd Al-Malik missed a son of his during Jumah one week. When he met him later, he asked him, "Why did you miss Jumah?"

His son replied, "My donkey couldn't make the trip."

His father then said, "Couldn't you have walked!" For an entire year after that, Hisham ibn Abd Al-Malik made his son walk to Jumah.

Secondly: The piety of the father and mother reaches the children. In the Qur'an, Allah recalls for us the story of Khidr, and how he rebuilt a wall for 2 orphans.

And as for the wall, it belonged to two orphan boys in the town. Under it was a treasure belonging to them and their father was a righteous man…(Al Kahf 18/82)

Look at how Allah protected these orphans because of the piety of their father. In tafseer, it is said that it was in fact because of the piety of their grandfather seven generations back! Sa'eed ibn Jubayr said, "I often lengthen my salah for the sake of my son; perhaps Allah may protect him (because of it)."

In conclusion, let us reflect on the virtue of respecting our parents:

It is one of the greatest things that we can do. In Bukhari and Muslim, from Abdullah ibn Mas'ood radi Allahu anhu, a man asked the Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam, "What deed is most beloved by Allah?"

He - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - said, "Salah on time."

The man asked, "And then?"

He - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - said, "Respecting and revering ones parents."

He asked, "And then?"

"Jihaad for the sake of Allah."

It is a means by which our sins are forgiven. When Allah commanded in the Qur'an:

And We enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents …

The next verse tells us:

Respecting our parents will lead us to Jannah! In Muslim, Abu Hurayrah radi Allahu anhu narrated that he heard the Messenger of Allah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam say, "May he perish! May he perish! May he perish!"

It was asked, "Who, O Messenger of Allah?"

The Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said, "He whose parents attain old age in his life - one or both of them - and he does not enter Paradise (because of his goodness towards them)."

And when our parents are gone, the goodness towards them does not end.

Malik ibn Rabi'ah Al-Saa'idi narrated: We were sitting with the Messenger of Allah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam when an Ansari man came and asked, "O Messenger of Allah, is there anything left from my birr to my parents that I should present to them after their death?"

The Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Yes, four things: Pray and ask forgiveness for them. Fulfill their pledges. Be kind to their friends. And maintain the ties of kinship that come from only their direction. That is what is left from your birr to them after their death."

Ahmad, Abu Dawood, and Ibn Maajah reported that Aamir ibn Abd Allah ibn Az-Zubayr radi Allahu anhu said, "My father died, and for an entire year I did not ask Allah for anything except that He forgive my father."

Remember dear brothers and sisters as you meet your parents today, the words of Rasul Allah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam, "Fa feehima fa jaahid!" – Do Jihad in (your kind treatment of) your parents.

O Allah, forgive us and our parents, and reward them with the finest reward. O Allah, elevate their position in the hereafter and this dunya; make that which befalls them an expiation for their sins. O Allah, grant them residence in Firdaus, the highest level of Jannah, with the Prophets, the Siddeeqeen, and the Martyrs.


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